The Single Supplement

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The Single Supplement
The Single Supplement
Dear Nicola, I'm a single mum but my brothers still expect me to solely care for my elderly parents

Dear Nicola, I'm a single mum but my brothers still expect me to solely care for my elderly parents

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Nicola Slawson
Apr 12, 2023
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The Single Supplement
The Single Supplement
Dear Nicola, I'm a single mum but my brothers still expect me to solely care for my elderly parents
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Dear Nicola,

My question is whether you think that the gender imbalance between girls and boys in childhood just carries on into adulthood? Or whether I’m alone in feeling this way.

What I mean by this is that when I was a child, I had to iron my dads’ works shirts, clean the bathroom and dust the bookcase every week to earn my pocket money, whereas other than keeping his own room tidy which he never fully achieved, my brothers were only given little easy chores. Now as adults, I am a single parent of 18years, I work full time and have been the primary carer for both my parents. Neither of my brothers does anything to help because of their work/life schedule! This makes me so mad. It’s taken as a default that as I have no ‘grown up’ partner, I’m ‘spare’ and simply here to serve. I have done everything for both parents and it has pretty much bankrupted me, and cost my own life balance dearly – and that of my children.

What irks me the most is the absolute acceptance by everyone. I cannot…

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